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Best statuses - Best Facebook status updates

I like work. It fascinates me. I sit and look at it for hours.I like work. It fascinates me. I sit and look at it for hours.
HOW TO MAKE YOUR PARENTS THINK YOU'RE INSANE Follow them around the house everywhere Moo when they say your name Run into walls Say that wearing clothes is against your religion Jump off the roof, trying to fly Hold their hand and whisper to them, I see dead people At everything they say yell, Liar Stand over them at four in the morning with a huge grin on your face and say, good morning sunshine Try to swim in the floorHOW TO MAKE YOUR PARENTS THINK YOU'RE INSANE Follow them around the house everywhere Moo when they say your name Run into walls Say that wearing clothes is against your religion Jump off the roof, trying to fly Hold their hand and whisper to them, I see dead people At everything they say yell, Liar Stand over them at four in the morning with a huge grin on your face and say, good morning sunshine Try to swim in the floor
Dogs have masters. Cats have staff.Dogs have masters. Cats have staff.
I wish love was like volleyball. You'd call 'MINE' and everyone would back off!I wish love was like volleyball. You'd call 'MINE' and everyone would back off!
Saw Gloria Gaynor's ghost last night. First I was afraid, I was petrified.Saw Gloria Gaynor's ghost last night. First I was afraid, I was petrified.
"Who are you texting, honey?" *name of boy* "Is he your boyfriend?" "No, mom." "Do you like him?" "NO, mom!" "Who DO you like?" "GO AWAY, MOM!""Who are you texting, honey?" *name of boy* "Is he your boyfriend?" "No, mom." "Do you like him?" "NO, mom!" "Who DO you like?" "GO AWAY, MOM!"
If your going to lie, lie to rihanna, because she loves it, and i don't.If your going to lie, lie to rihanna, because she loves it, and i don't.
Yes, there's plenty more fish in the sea, but your my nemo <3 Yes, there's plenty more fish in the sea, but your my nemo <3
Women only belong in the kitchen? No action in the bedroom for you then.Women only belong in the kitchen? No action in the bedroom for you then.
*LOG OUT* .......bored...... *SIGN IN**LOG OUT* .......bored...... *SIGN IN*
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