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Best Facebook status updates - Sunday - Page 105

Waving the offside flag when your Girlfriend leaves the kitchenWaving the offside flag when your Girlfriend leaves the kitchen
Doing whatever the f**k you want, because it's your life and no one else'sDoing whatever the f**k you want, because it's your life and no one else's
Crying after sex because you're sick of women using you for your hot body.Crying after sex because you're sick of women using you for your hot body.
Giving your friend the last chip so they have to deal with the rubbishGiving your friend the last chip so they have to deal with the rubbish
Police call it "Drunk and Disorderly" we call it "having a good night"Police call it "Drunk and Disorderly" we call it "having a good night"
You may wear the pants in this relationship, but i control the zipper. (:You may wear the pants in this relationship, but i control the zipper. (:
High heels were invented so women could put away dishes on the top shelf.High heels were invented so women could put away dishes on the top shelf.
Guys who can cookGuys who can cook
Having weird inside jokes with your friendsHaving weird inside jokes with your friends
Dear Pringles, I cannot fit my hand inside your tube of deliciousness.Dear Pringles, I cannot fit my hand inside your tube of deliciousness.
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