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Best Facebook status updates - Thursday - Page 82
I know a bunch of random usless facts that will get me nowhere in life.
"I got a ride Mom." "With who?" "I don't know but they have candy."
Licking your food so you dont have to share.
Standing in the kitchen pretending to be a woman, making woman noises
Watching a romantic movie and accepting the fact you're going to die alone.
Sending good morning texts to yourself because no one loves you.
Doing whatever the f**k you want, because it's your life and no one else's
Licking Candy Canes Till They're Sharp And Then Stabbing People With Them
Crying after sex because you're sick of women using you for your hot body.
Giving your friend the last chip so they have to deal with the rubbish
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