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Best Facebook status updates - Tuesday - Page 85

Roses are blue, violets are unicorns. This doesnt make sense. Refrigerator.Roses are blue, violets are unicorns. This doesnt make sense. Refrigerator.
Roses are red,violets are blue,i have 5 fingers, the middle one for you!Roses are red,violets are blue,i have 5 fingers, the middle one for you!
Not messing with adele, because she'll write a whole album about you.Not messing with adele, because she'll write a whole album about you.
Walking around the house like a half dressed prostitute because your too lazy to put proper clothes on.Walking around the house like a half dressed prostitute because your too lazy to put proper clothes on.
Had a dream I was a king. Woke up, still king.Had a dream I was a king. Woke up, still king.
Lost your pen = no pen. No pen = no notes. No notes = no study. No study = fail. Fail = no diploma. No diploma = no work. No work = no money. No money = no food. No food = you get skinny. Skinny = then you get ugly. Ugly = no lover. No lover = no marriageLost your pen = no pen. No pen = no notes. No notes = no study. No study = fail. Fail = no diploma. No diploma = no work. No work = no money. No money = no food. No food = you get skinny. Skinny = then you get ugly. Ugly = no lover. No lover = no marriage
Grandpa: When i was your age my momma would send me down to the store with $1 and I would come back with 5 bags of potatoes 2 loaves of bread, 3 bottles of milk a box of tea and 6 eggs but you cant do that these days too many stupid security cameras.Grandpa: When i was your age my momma would send me down to the store with $1 and I would come back with 5 bags of potatoes 2 loaves of bread, 3 bottles of milk a box of tea and 6 eggs but you cant do that these days too many stupid security cameras.
A brunette goes to the doctor, and says, "Doctor I'm hurting all over my body." "That's odd", replied the doctor, "Show me what you mean" So the girl takes her finger and pokes her elbow, and screams in pain. She touches her knee and cries in agony and so on. The doctor says, "You're not a natural brunette are you?" "No I'm a blonde", she replies. "I thought so.... your finger is broken.", replies the doctor.A brunette goes to the doctor, and says, "Doctor I'm hurting all over my body." "That's odd", replied the doctor, "Show me what you mean" So the girl takes her finger and pokes her elbow, and screams in pain. She touches her knee and cries in agony and so on. The doctor says, "You're not a natural brunette are you?" "No I'm a blonde", she replies. "I thought so.... your finger is broken.", replies the doctor.
Wow. You guys are so cool for taking a profile picture. Of yourself. In a mirror. In your bathroom. With a toilet as your background. Nice. XDWow. You guys are so cool for taking a profile picture. Of yourself. In a mirror. In your bathroom. With a toilet as your background. Nice. XD
How can I "let go" of the past, when it has such a bloody firm grip?How can I "let go" of the past, when it has such a bloody firm grip?
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