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Best Facebook status updates - July - Page 61

I want someone to love me for me, not my mad sex skills.I want someone to love me for me, not my mad sex skills.
Good girls go to Heaven, bad girls make you feel like you're in Heaven.Good girls go to Heaven, bad girls make you feel like you're in Heaven.
LIKE THIS if you know SOMEONE who needs a smack with a shovelLIKE THIS if you know SOMEONE who needs a smack with a shovel
Waving the offside flag when your Girlfriend leaves the kitchenWaving the offside flag when your Girlfriend leaves the kitchen
Looking at % instead of price when buying alcohol.Looking at % instead of price when buying alcohol.
Ohe satisfaction of sleeping in your own bed after being away for so long.Ohe satisfaction of sleeping in your own bed after being away for so long.
Blanket on - too hot, blanket off - too cold, stick leg out - Demon eats youBlanket on - too hot, blanket off - too cold, stick leg out - Demon eats you
Looking at someone and think "Yep you have a person in you basement"Looking at someone and think "Yep you have a person in you basement"
Dear Pringles, I cannot fit my hand inside your tube of deliciousness.Dear Pringles, I cannot fit my hand inside your tube of deliciousness.
You're on my to do list ;)You're on my to do list ;)
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