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Best Facebook status updates - Monday - Page 103

Falling in love with strangers on public transport.Falling in love with strangers on public transport.
Girls ignore nice guys and chase a*sholes, then complain about it. Fact.Girls ignore nice guys and chase a*sholes, then complain about it. Fact.
Alcohol doesn't give you the answer. But it makes you forget the question.Alcohol doesn't give you the answer. But it makes you forget the question.
Women only belong in the kitchen? No action in the bedroom for you then.Women only belong in the kitchen? No action in the bedroom for you then.
My neighbour is stalking me, he Googled me, I saw it through my telescope.My neighbour is stalking me, he Googled me, I saw it through my telescope.
"Does this dress make me look fat?" ... "No, your fat makes you look fat.""Does this dress make me look fat?" ... "No, your fat makes you look fat."
Not texting back for 3 hours because you're a hard to get bastardNot texting back for 3 hours because you're a hard to get bastard
Dropping out of society to live in the wilderness as a unicornDropping out of society to live in the wilderness as a unicorn
Sitting on your floor in your undies. Not knowing what to wear.Sitting on your floor in your undies. Not knowing what to wear.
Asking Gollum to be the Ring Bearer for your Wedding.Asking Gollum to be the Ring Bearer for your Wedding.
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