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Best Facebook status updates - This Week - Page 9

Barney Stinson "When I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead"Barney Stinson "When I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead"
Night out rules: drink TRIPLE, see DOUBLE, act SINGLE.Night out rules: drink TRIPLE, see DOUBLE, act SINGLE.
I don't trust people who don't drink... They're hiding something!!I don't trust people who don't drink... They're hiding something!!
Panicking when your finger gets stuck in something stupidPanicking when your finger gets stuck in something stupid
You may wear the pants in this relationship, but i control the zipper. (:You may wear the pants in this relationship, but i control the zipper. (:
Doing whatever the f**k you want, because it's your life and no one else'sDoing whatever the f**k you want, because it's your life and no one else's
High Heels ♥High Heels ♥
Good girls go to Heaven, bad girls make you feel like you're in Heaven.Good girls go to Heaven, bad girls make you feel like you're in Heaven.
"You’re too gorgeous to be single" - "You’re too ugly to be flirting with me""You’re too gorgeous to be single" - "You’re too ugly to be flirting with me"
"Are you trying to get me drunk?" "Not drunk, just relaxed and naked.""Are you trying to get me drunk?" "Not drunk, just relaxed and naked."
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