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Best Facebook status updates - April - Page 65

I want someone to love me for me, not my mad sex skills.I want someone to love me for me, not my mad sex skills.
When I Die, the Cat Gets Everything.When I Die, the Cat Gets Everything.
LIKE THIS if you know SOMEONE who needs a smack with a shovelLIKE THIS if you know SOMEONE who needs a smack with a shovel
nobody bring me DOWN!nobody bring me DOWN!
Licking your food so you dont have to share.Licking your food so you dont have to share.
Getting a sticker at the dentist because you're a brave bastard.Getting a sticker at the dentist because you're a brave bastard.
Marrying whoever wins Masterchef because you're a hungry bastardMarrying whoever wins Masterchef because you're a hungry bastard
Johnny, la gente esta muy locaJohnny, la gente esta muy loca
Blanket on - too hot, blanket off - too cold, stick leg out - Demon eats youBlanket on - too hot, blanket off - too cold, stick leg out - Demon eats you
Making a big deal over nothing because you're a womanMaking a big deal over nothing because you're a woman
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