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Best Facebook status updates - Last Week - Page 102

My neighbour is stalking me, he Googled me, I saw it through my telescope.My neighbour is stalking me, he Googled me, I saw it through my telescope.
all we need is diet.all we need is diet.
My imaginary girlfriend dumped me today... Let's Get FAT!!My imaginary girlfriend dumped me today... Let's Get FAT!!
Being inappropriately drunk at low-key family gatheringsBeing inappropriately drunk at low-key family gatherings
When everyone is in a relationship, and you're like lol where are my catsWhen everyone is in a relationship, and you're like lol where are my cats
Not telling your parents about the nice man who gives you candy in his van.Not telling your parents about the nice man who gives you candy in his van.
*Checks who`s online*. Oh shit, LOG OUT LOG OUT LOG OUT!!! "Hey what`s up?" Damn!*Checks who`s online*. Oh shit, LOG OUT LOG OUT LOG OUT!!! "Hey what`s up?" Damn!
Getting a ma*sive urge to kiss someone when they're next to youGetting a ma*sive urge to kiss someone when they're next to you
Our small, stupid conversations mean more to me than you'll ever knowOur small, stupid conversations mean more to me than you'll ever know
When I Die, the Cat Gets Everything.When I Die, the Cat Gets Everything.
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