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Best Facebook status updates - Last Week - Page 128

Falling in love with strangers on public transport.Falling in love with strangers on public transport.
Women only belong in the kitchen? No action in the bedroom for you then.Women only belong in the kitchen? No action in the bedroom for you then.
My neighbour is stalking me, he Googled me, I saw it through my telescope.My neighbour is stalking me, he Googled me, I saw it through my telescope.
That awkward moment when you're in the car, and you look at the people in the car next to you, and they're already looking at you.That awkward moment when you're in the car, and you look at the people in the car next to you, and they're already looking at you.
all we need is diet.all we need is diet.
Laying on the bathroom floor... Not my favorite way to start the day.Laying on the bathroom floor... Not my favorite way to start the day.
Not telling your parents about the nice man who gives you candy in his van.Not telling your parents about the nice man who gives you candy in his van.
"Are you trying to get me drunk?" "Not drunk, just relaxed and naked.""Are you trying to get me drunk?" "Not drunk, just relaxed and naked."
When I'm bored I stand in the garden and pretend to be a carrot.When I'm bored I stand in the garden and pretend to be a carrot.
Old enough to know its a bad idea, young enough not to careOld enough to know its a bad idea, young enough not to care
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