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Best Facebook status updates - Saturday - Page 97
High Heels ♥
I know a bunch of random usless facts that will get me nowhere in life.
"I got a ride Mom." "With who?" "I don't know but they have candy."
Standing in the kitchen pretending to be a woman, making woman noises
Watching a romantic movie and accepting the fact you're going to die alone.
"Dude she just called you hot" - "They all do"
Sending good morning texts to yourself because no one loves you.
Waving the offside flag when your Girlfriend leaves the kitchen
Doing whatever the f**k you want, because it's your life and no one else's
Licking Candy Canes Till They're Sharp And Then Stabbing People With Them
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