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Best Facebook status updates - May - Page 72
Oh great now that song's stuck in my head all day and i only know 1 line.
Have you ever seen me and batman at the same time? I didn't think so.
Dear 4th Grader, On Facebook, your relationship status is 'It's complicated'. What he do? Steal your animal crackers? Sincerely, Your Mother.
Old enough to know its a bad idea, young enough not to care
I know a bunch of random usless facts that will get me nowhere in life.
"I got a ride Mom." "With who?" "I don't know but they have candy."
Texting your mate after a night out to make sure they're alive
Sending good morning texts to yourself because no one loves you.
Licking Candy Canes Till They're Sharp And Then Stabbing People With Them
Crying after sex because you're sick of women using you for your hot body.
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