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Best Facebook status updates - Page 34
"No offense" means "I'm about to insult you, but don't get mad."
When i was little i used to fall asleep on the sofa and wake up in bed, now i pass out on the sofa and wake up on the floor.
Getting in bed, and texting the person you wish was there with you :)
I hope the Olympics teaches kids and parents that in real life you do not get a trophy just for participating.
Some people go to high school. Some people go to school, high.
Letting Vodka make all your decisions
Person is typing... Person is typing... Person is typing... Person is typing... Person is typing... Person is typing... Person says: hi
I used to like you. Then you dissed Harry Potter.
To be aware is to be alive, To stand still is to Die....
I'm a ninja. No you're not. Did you see me do that? Do what? Exactly.
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