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Best Facebook status updates - Sunday - Page 73

Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.
Old people at weddings always poke me and say "You're next." So, I started doing the same thing to them at funeralsOld people at weddings always poke me and say "You're next." So, I started doing the same thing to them at funerals
What do you call a guy who makes jokes about girls being in the kitchen? Single.What do you call a guy who makes jokes about girls being in the kitchen? Single.
If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea... does that mean that one enjoys it?If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea... does that mean that one enjoys it?
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
I ♥ my own bed. But I’ll be honest, I'd much rather be in yours ;)I ♥ my own bed. But I’ll be honest, I'd much rather be in yours ;)
The difference between school and life? In school, you're taught a lesson and then given a test. In life, you're given a test that teaches you a lesson.The difference between school and life? In school, you're taught a lesson and then given a test. In life, you're given a test that teaches you a lesson.
If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.
The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list.The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list.
The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good ideas!The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good ideas!
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