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Best Facebook status updates - This Week - Page 118

My imaginary girlfriend dumped me today... Let's Get FAT!!My imaginary girlfriend dumped me today... Let's Get FAT!!
When everyone is in a relationship, and you're like lol where are my catsWhen everyone is in a relationship, and you're like lol where are my cats
I want someone to love me for me, not my mad sex skills.I want someone to love me for me, not my mad sex skills.
Our small, stupid conversations mean more to me than you'll ever knowOur small, stupid conversations mean more to me than you'll ever know
Lying on the kitchen floor crying because there is nothing good to eat.Lying on the kitchen floor crying because there is nothing good to eat.
Playing with your shadow, because you have no friends.Playing with your shadow, because you have no friends.
Just be yourself it doesn't matter if it's good enough for someone else...Just be yourself it doesn't matter if it's good enough for someone else...
LIKE THIS if you know SOMEONE who needs a smack with a shovelLIKE THIS if you know SOMEONE who needs a smack with a shovel
"I got a ride Mom." "With who?" "I don't know but they have candy.""I got a ride Mom." "With who?" "I don't know but they have candy."
Sending good morning texts to yourself because no one loves you.Sending good morning texts to yourself because no one loves you.
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