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Best Facebook status updates - Wednesday - Page 6

I drink on only two occasions, when it's my birthday and when it's not.I drink on only two occasions, when it's my birthday and when it's not.
Standing in the kitchen pretending to be a woman, making woman noisesStanding in the kitchen pretending to be a woman, making woman noises
nobody bring me DOWN!nobody bring me DOWN!
Lying on the kitchen floor crying because there is nothing good to eat.Lying on the kitchen floor crying because there is nothing good to eat.
Not telling your parents about the nice man who gives you candy in his van.Not telling your parents about the nice man who gives you candy in his van.
Laying on the bathroom floor... Not my favorite way to start the day.Laying on the bathroom floor... Not my favorite way to start the day.
My imaginary girlfriend dumped me today... Let's Get FAT!!My imaginary girlfriend dumped me today... Let's Get FAT!!
Look at your status, now back to mine, now back at yours, now back at mine. Sadly, yours isn’t mine. But if you stopped posting about the other things and made this your status, yours could be like mine. Look down, back up. Where are you? You’re on Facebook, reading the status your status could be like. I’m on a computer.Look at your status, now back to mine, now back at yours, now back at mine. Sadly, yours isn’t mine. But if you stopped posting about the other things and made this your status, yours could be like mine. Look down, back up. Where are you? You’re on Facebook, reading the status your status could be like. I’m on a computer.
Monday Tuesday WTF (Wednesday Thursday Friday)Monday Tuesday WTF (Wednesday Thursday Friday)
Girls ignore nice guys and chase a*sholes, then complain about it. Fact.Girls ignore nice guys and chase a*sholes, then complain about it. Fact.
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