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Best Facebook status updates - Page 136
Marrying whoever wins Masterchef because you're a hungry bastard
Looking at someone and thinking "The things i would do to you"
that feeling you get when you are listening to a spanish ska punk band and you get a boner
Hi, I'm a spider and I can make girls scream way louder than you boys can
Just be yourself it doesn't matter if it's good enough for someone else...
Sitting on the couch and doing nothing
Panicking when your finger gets stuck in something stupid
i absolutely hate thinking about you, and i hate missing you even more: i have no space in my heart or mind, for a criminal like you to hide, especially when i was pushed aside, for the biggest mistake of your life...
Dear Pringles, I cannot fit my hand inside your tube of deliciousness.
Why do we use our blankets as shields at night? Like is the monster gonna be like ” oh shit…..they have a blanket..RRRUUUUNNN!!!!”
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