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Best Facebook status updates - June - Page 99

First thing you do when you wake up is reach for your phone.First thing you do when you wake up is reach for your phone.
Pardon me, sir gangster, but I believe your trousers are descending.Pardon me, sir gangster, but I believe your trousers are descending.
I'm not in a bad mood, you're just annoying.I'm not in a bad mood, you're just annoying.
Why do we close our eyes when we pray? When we cry? When we dream? Or when we kiss? Because we know that the most beautiful things in life are not seen, but felt by heart.Why do we close our eyes when we pray? When we cry? When we dream? Or when we kiss? Because we know that the most beautiful things in life are not seen, but felt by heart.
FREAKING OUT WHEN SOMETHING TOUCHES YOUR FOOT IN THE SEA!!FREAKING OUT WHEN SOMETHING TOUCHES YOUR FOOT IN THE SEA!!
You miss the days when you could safely push someone into a pool, now you gotta worry about the iPod, the cellphone, maybe a PSP, you push someone in, it costs you $939.You miss the days when you could safely push someone into a pool, now you gotta worry about the iPod, the cellphone, maybe a PSP, you push someone in, it costs you $939.
When I'm bored I sit on Facebook and Like stuff...When I'm bored I sit on Facebook and Like stuff...
Ale-alejandro, Papa-Paparazzi, Po-po-po-pokerface, Te-te-te-telephone... Hmmmm am I the only one that thinks Lady Gaga might have a speech impediment?Ale-alejandro, Papa-Paparazzi, Po-po-po-pokerface, Te-te-te-telephone... Hmmmm am I the only one that thinks Lady Gaga might have a speech impediment?
Dear Tummy, sorry for all the butterflies. Dear Pillow, sorry for all the tears. Dear Heart, sorry for all the damage. Dear Brain, you were rightDear Tummy, sorry for all the butterflies. Dear Pillow, sorry for all the tears. Dear Heart, sorry for all the damage. Dear Brain, you were right
Hangovers: God's way of saying "YOU KICKED ASS LAST NIGHT"Hangovers: God's way of saying "YOU KICKED ASS LAST NIGHT"
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